Reaching Goals and Holding Them Loosely

Well, you are ten days into the New Year. You are likely nearing (if not already approached) the point where you are no longer energized to continue these resolutions or changes. Some of us have already bombed our commitment to give up sugar, coffee, or bread. Some of us, even after buying new workout gear, can barely drag ourselves from the couch to the gym. A few of you made commitments to read Scripture or pray daily and may be going strong. Others of us are already a bit discouraged.

I am guilty of setting unrealistic goals and then getting frustrated when I don’t meet them. My experience tells me to limit myself to 3-5 concrete goals and then schedule them into your life. Desire more exercise? Make an appointment with yourself on Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 6:30 a.m. Desire increased biblical knowledge? Schedule yourself to read Scripture and resource books Tuesday and Thursday at 9:00 a.m. Making room for these changes in our routines at specific times prioritizes them in our life.

Then, hold onto your goals loosely. Wait. What? Yes. I can have a rigid personality. In order to be fully present in my life, I need to be able to adjust and adapt to unexpected circumstance. That means knowing when to adjust my expectations or timeline. Not all obstacles should derail us from our goals. However, transformation comes with both intentional practices and responding to the unexpected. Caring for a loved one after an unexpected illness may not help you reach your goal of increased biblical knowledge. But it could teach you endlessly about vulnerability, compassion, service, and the value of one’s presence. Adjusting one’s financial goals after unexpected car trouble may not bring you closer to the magic number for your savings account. But it could teach you about simplicity, the value of coordination to be a one-car family, and the grace of relationships formed through carpooling.

I have learned over the years is that I need multiple opportunities throughout the year to reflect, evaluate, and clarify the direction of my life. The New Year, along with the beginning of a school year, are convenient times in my life but I recommend looking at the rhythm of your life and look for the natural breaks or cycles that you are already following. Maybe your life cycles around two busy stretches at work or you orient your life around the four seasons. These are natural opportunities for recalibrating your life. As we continually recalibrate our lives, we open ourselves up to the transforming work of God.

Kasey McCollum is a hospital chaplain in Denton, TX. She is particularly focused on grief support for families experiencing perinatal and newborn death. She is a contributor to the newly released book “Finding Their Voices: Sermons by Women in the Churches of Christ” by D’Esta Love. She loves to cook but loathes doing the dishes. When she isn’t working or playing with her children you will likely find her doing hot yoga or by the campfire with friends. She lives in Denton, TX, with her husband Casey (yes, you read that correctly) and their two children, Clare and Micah.

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Author:  Publish Date: January 10, 2017


The CHARIS website hosts conversations of and about Churches of Christ. In partnership with the ACU Library and the Siburt Institute for Church Ministry at Abilene Christian University (Abilene, TX), the website is supported and led by the Center for Heritage and Renewal in Spirituality (CHARIS) at ACU. The Center’s mission is to renew Christian spirituality through engagement of Christian heritage, at Abilene Christian University and beyond. The views expressed on the CHARIS website are those of the various authors, and do not necessarily represent the views of Abilene Christian University or CHARIS at ACU. Questions or comments about the CHARIS website can be directed to charis @

2017-18 CHARIS Editorial Board:
Dr. Carisse Berryhill
Dr. Jason Fikes
Karissa Herchenroeder
Mac Ice
Chai Green
Tammy Marcelain
Molly Scherer
Dr. John Weaver

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